NINJA SLAYER

“Mu-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Mu-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! ” Laomoto laughed to his heart’s content. At his feet, one of the oiran climaxed alone. Then, the three oiran wrapped in each other’s arms followed suit reaching orgasm nearby.
“You made my day, Omura-san. Your company’s what's-his-face ninja runs like a dream.”
“I'm most grateful.”

As Laomoto annoyingly signaled with his hand, the oiran courtesans straightened up their indecent, undone kimonos and rushed out of the room with indecent haste. On the other side of the monitor, the captain repeatedly bowed down on his knees.
“I'm most grateful. Most grateful. Midway was a little touch-and-go but ---.” His words were broadcast with crackling static as the monitor visuals cut in and out due to the severe damage from the throwing star attacks.

“Recover the body,” Laomoto commanded with haughty arrogance. “How dare that vermin defy the Syndicate. Investigate his body with fine-toothed comb.”
“My pleasure. I’ll alert our company ninja now.”
Laomoto controlled the deck next to the monitor revealing a lavish body sushi feast with several new oiran as the main course. The night was still young as the Khan’s banquet of debauchery kicked into high gear.

Like a bio-starfish sunken in the abyssal plain, Ninja Slayer’s murky, mano-vijnana conscious floated helplessly amid the neuron darkness. The damage suffered in the explosion and the fall had been great. How careless he had been. Had his weak enemy been more formidable than he thought? Had he bitten off more than he could chew? Were the series of battles the cause of his chaotic concentration?
“What a pathetic man. Actually, pathetic.” A half-stunned and half-mocking crumpled inner voice criticizes Ninja Slayer. “I had higher aspirations for you, Fujikido.”

Fujikido: Ninja Slayer’s actual name. And with that, he raised himself up. An evil presence stood by his side.
“When you keep company with apathetic pleasures like civilization, this is what happens in the end.”

“Silence!” Fujikido scorned.
But the evil being lingering about his neurons laughed in amusement.
“With my true karate, you’ll never lag behind a crane fly like that.
That…BWU-HU-HU-HA-HA, lesser ninja’s soul source is below the Anthophila ninja clan.
He’s a mere insect in the karmic cycle of life actually.”

“Quiet, you apparition. I can still go on. Let me do it.”
“What, boy? Say that again.”
“Ninja shall perish! That ninja will.”
“Yes indeed, Fujikido. So be it.” The sinister voiced agreed.
“Ninja shall perish. All ninja shall perish.”

“Ninja shall perish!”
“In that case, lend me your body, boy.”

“No!” Fujikido objected. The wicked apparition laughed.
“Good. Sleep there, Fujikido. You’re actually at your wits end. Let me be your guide. Let me show you the way.”
“Don’t! But…I still want to kill ninja.”
“Precisely. So the question answers itself, does it not?”
“Ninja shall perish!” As his conscious melted away, Fujikido succumbed. Murderous intent was all that remained.

“Yeeart!”

“What!” Peering down at the rubble from the sky, Cloud Buster fires up his jet pack going into full-alert mode as he climbs away at a diagonal angle.
This kind of ninja discernment is what saved him from danger, for soon after Ninja Slayer jumped vertically and delivered an ominous right hand chop. A second earlier and Cloud Buster would have been on the verge of decapitation!

Caught in the middle of a rock and roll ninja attack, Cloud Buster was thunderstruck. “That does not compute! Death was the only possible outcome!”
“Yeeart!” Ninja Slayer rolled round and round in the sky and landed a roundhouse kick in Cloud Buster’s excuse for an OS.
“Aaaargh!?” Cloud Buster went flying! And not with his jet pack mind you.
Ninja Slayer does a loop-the-loop backwards somersault, kicks off a building and jumps away!

“I-industry!” Recovering with a jet pack blast, Cloud Buster intercepts with his electromagnetic blade. “Yeeart!”
“Yeeart!” Ninja Slayer reels out a backfist and parries the attack with his manifer gauntlet covering the back of his hand! The blade sparks and crackles with electricity. But Ninja Slayer takes no heed!
“Oh no!”

“You toy robot!” Ninja Slayer sneered. The glint in his eyes glowed like a morning glory sparkler. An afterimage of the witching hour is imprinted in his brain.
Cloud Busters circuits overload with a hiss. “The electrical charge surely passed through him. Why? My weapon of modern civilization should have…”
From the force of his backhand blow, Ninja Slayer rolls sideways in the air. He deals another deadly roundhouse kick screaming, “Yeeart!”

“Aaaargh!” From the force of the fierce kick, Cloud Buster’s body doglegs and he’s blow back. Vomit seeps from the exhaust vent in his menpo. Unable to retrofire in time, his back smashes into the wall of a building.
“Yeeart!” Ninja Slayer rolls sideways again from the force of his kick. He flings a rope.

At the other end of the rope, Cloud Buster’s sharp, heavy claws are bound tight. He’s tied at the nape of his neck like a counterweight. “Aaaargh!?”
Ninja Slayer roars with laughter. In mid-air, he pulls with all his might, wrapping the rope tighter and tighter around Cloud Buster’s neck.
“Aaaargh!?” Cloud Buster is frantic and fully throttles his jet pack. He makes a half-crazed vertical ascent.

Cloud Buster gyrates at high speed in the night sky. The rope around his neck stretches into bridle reins, which Ninja Slayer now clenches.
Alas! Behold this nightmare on ninja street!
“Well? How do you like me now? WHA-HA-HA-HA.”With no regard for this extreme danger, Ninja Slayer happily hurls sinister snickers and evil guffaws at Cloud Buster from the bottom of his possessed soul.

A half-crazed Cloud Buster recklessly takes flight screaming, “A-aaargh!”
While being pulled into space, Ninja Slayer applies delicate force with both hands tormenting Cloud Buster as he steers their flight. And now, right in Cloud Buster’s flight path is…Namusan! The demon gargoyle zeppelin!

“Aa…Aa…Aaargh!” KRAAAASH! Cloud Buster batters through the armor of the demon gargoyle zeppelin and plunges into the engine bay.
“Wasshoi!” Pulled by the reins into the airship, Ninja Slayer lets go of the rope and rolls on the floor.
“A-aaargh!” The forward propulsion from Cloud Buster’s jet pack sends him throw the roof and soaring in the night sky.

“A-aaargh! See you in hell!” Ninja Slayer sneered!
Reduced to a fireball, Cloud Buster now crazily sputters in the night sky at random vectors. “Aaah! Aah! Sayonara!”
Then like fireworks Cloud Buster scattered everywhither till kingdom come. Oh my Buddha!
“Enjoy your flight you scrap iron, incompetent show off! Your morsel of karate was of little sustenance!” Ninja Slayer hurls abuse lashing out at the now deceased Cloud Buster. Ninja Slayer doesn’t take shit from nobody!

“Aieee!?” Already fighting an uphill battle trying to steer the blazing airship while unable to decide if they should bailout due to Laomoto watching on the monitor, the flight operators completely surrender and fall into a panic from the impact and Ninja Slayer’s entry. While pissing their flight suits, the flight crew mindlessly runs around in every direction; Ninja Slayer simply howls with laughter.

“Aieee! Aieeee! Aie…” The signal on the monitor fizzles and the image turns to TV fuzz.
“Yeeart!” Laomoto stands up like a tornado in a trailer park. Wielding both of the katana swords slung at his waist, he slices the monitor into three parts! The lavish body sushi oiran on her back felt the wrath of his nearby blade and somberly swooned.
Gripping both swords with a demonic aura, Laomoto scowled at the heavens through the tempered glass. Beyond his line of sight, a cluster of fire billowing dense smoke slowly freefell towards the Tama River.
“Ninja Slayer!”